Forgiving Self and Others -- Correcting Some Distortions
by Randall Murphree
October 14, 2004
(AgapePress) - "Retaliation is often portrayed as a virtue reflecting healthy self-esteem," writes John MacArthur in The Freedom and Power of Forgiveness (Crossway Books, 1998).He continues: "Our society is drunk on the grapes of human wrath. Road-rage, disgruntled employee rampages, drive-by shootings and other crimes of vengeance are the hallmarks of this generation." Contrasting that attitude is the biblical principle of forgiveness.
"Nothing is more foreign to sinful human nature [than is forgiveness]," MacArthur writes. "And nothing is more characteristic of divine grace." His opening chapter focuses on the reconciliation offered through the Atonement of Christ. He calls it the "ground of all forgiveness."
Throughout the book, he reiterates that Christ taught by precept and example that forgiveness is essential for the Christian. For example, His instruction/example given in the Sermon on the Mount teaches us to ask His forgiveness as well as to forgive those who sin against us. And in His dying prayer, our Savior offered a supreme model for us: "Father forgive them."
Forgiving Self
If the contemporary believer has already been analyzed, advised, counseled and brainwashed by the school of self-esteem that permeates pop psychology, he won't be happy with MacArthur's expose of the phenomenon.
He says it is often no more than a cover for those who refuse to deal with guilt. This self-forgiveness fallacy is not really a major theme of the book if one looks only at the number of words the author gives to it. However, in view of its popularity, it should sound a major alarm for readers. In chapter nine -- "Answering the Hard Questions" -- MacArthur tackles "What if I cannot forgive myself?"
His answer: "I realize there are some who teach that a kind of self-forgiveness is necessary. I find this nowhere in Scripture .... this usually turns out to be a kind of sinful pride exacerbated by modern self-esteem philosophy."
MacArthur believes this self-esteem principle corrupts the truth of Scriptures. He says biblical principles suggest that we need to understand forgiveness on two plains -- how to accept God's forgiveness of our sins, and how to extend forgiveness to others. Both, working together, bring freedom and power to the believer.
"[N]early all the personal problems that drive people to seek pastoral counsel are related in some way to the issue of forgiveness," he says.
Questions and More Questions
Though rarely in a literal question-and-answer format, the entire volume is driven by questions. In the introduction, MacArthur promises to answer these questions, among others: Can we be sure of God's forgiveness? If Christians are forgiven already, why do they need to confess sin in their daily lives? How are we supposed to confess our sins?
Along the way he addresses some sticky points that scholars and theologians are sometimes prone to debate. Ideas such as conditional and unconditional forgiveness, confronting or not confronting offenders, and the role of forgiveness in church discipline. Often controversial, always challenging.
Also among the "hard to answer" questions he addresses are:
- To whom should we confess our sins?
- Should I confess my unfaithfulness to my wife?
- How should we handle repeat offenses?
- What is the difference between true repentance and a mere apology?
Appendices include essays on the Atonement and on the unforgivable sin, plus two classic sermons on forgiveness by Charles H. Spurgeon and Alexander MacLauren.
MacArthur's passion is evident in his word choices. "Unforgiveness is a toxin," he writes. "It poisons the heart and mind with bitterness, distorting one's whole perspective of life." The obvious antidote -- forgiveness. "Forgiveness is a healthy, wholesome, virtuous, liberating act. Forgiveness unleashes joy. It brings peace. It washes the slate clean."
John MacArthur is pastor-teacher of Grace Community Church in Sun Valley, California. His other titles include The MacArthur Study Bible, The Glory of Heaven and The Power of Integrity.
Even the skeptic -- if he'll read MacArthur with an open mind -- will soon be seeking new freedom and power through forgiveness.
Randall Murphree, a regular contributor to AgapePress, is editor of AFA Journal, a monthly publication of the American Family Association.
