Author: Men Prefer a 'Leader' Jesus Over a 'Warm, Fuzzy' One
by Mary Rettig
August 18, 2005
(AgapePress) - A Christian author says men are leaving the Church in increasing numbers -- and it's a problem the Church needs to solve, he adds. David Murrow, author of Why Men Hate Going to Church, says only about 20 percent of churches have active men's ministries, while women's and children's ministries are in abundance. Murrow says it is just a response to the market.
Women and children show up; men don't," the author explains. "But still, that sends a very strong message to men that [they] are unwanted and unneeded. And Dr. John Gray wrote in Men are From Mars, Women Are From Venus that not to be needed is slow death for a man. We have to do a better job needing our men."
Murrow says one way churches can do that is by starting ministries that involve men's gifts and interests. He says his own church has a car ministry in which men get together and fix up donated cars to give to single mothers and the working poor. He says they are not only fixing cars, but they have begun praying together and supporting each other in an environment that brings men alive.
The author says men's attendance at church is falling because the Church itself is not "man-friendly." Men, he contends, tend to find little or no interests for them at church.
"Our modern churches strive very much to be very warm, loving, accepting environments," he acknowledges. "We provide a very safe, nurturing, secure place where people can get to know friends and get to know God." And while that is "a wonderful thing on one level," he says "men and young people are more interested in challenge and adventure than they are in nurture and security."
Murrow says churches have feminized Jesus and focus too much on His gentility and meekness -- and seem to forget about the excitement He had with His disciples during His ministry.
He adds that recapturing the "wildness" of Jesus should start in Sunday School. Once boys get to their teenage years, the author feels it is time to tell them about the adventures Jesus had. Boys and men cannot identify with a "warm, fuzzy" Jesus, Murrow says -- but they will model a Jesus who is a strong leader.
Mary Rettig, a regular contributor to AgapePress, is a reporter for American Family Radio News, which can be heard online.